On Wednesday I got hired as a teller for a local bank. I feel two things. One: a sense of relief that I now have a job - part time - so that I can earn health benefits, maintain a paycheck, establish myself in a position so that later on I can move into full time.
Two: I've put myself back in my comfort zone. Which isnt good. Cus once I'm in my comfort zone, I tend to just settle for things. Like - not put as much time (any) into following my real goals. I tend to "hide behind" my jobs once I get them. Floating along, as if time isnt passing me by to pursue what I really want. Suddenly graudate school and a job in public policy seems "not that important".
I don't like being in my comfort zone. I seem to prefer that starving, anxious feeling I get when I know that the steps I'm taking are going after something a bit more impossible. Because when I feel that, I know I'm going after what I want, and not just whats safe.
I'm trying to find a volunteer position with Americorp. I'm also going to speak with the program director of a TESL program. Short of that, I'm going to use my time away from the banking line to continue with the volunteer/intern endeavors I've already begun.
I'm trying to follow my dreams.